Being socially awkward

My lecturer used a very good phrase last Wednesday in my class. He used the phrase:

Socially Awkward

To describe the guys in the film American Pie. This phrase had me thinking a lot, and I realized it’s actually a perfect way to describe me. I am socially awkward. Incredibly, in fact. I’m just a generally awkward person. I’m also not very affectionate. People have to make the first move with me, whether it be being friends with me or anything really. I get way too embarrassed and just end up making a fool out of myself.

Theres 3 times of people I can’t deal with, and that’s:

1) Children.

I can’t stand to be around children. Even that pic I’ve put up there gives me the creeps. People go ‘Awww I want her/him’ typically to babies, I go ‘ewww, why would you want that?’ For some reason Teresa + children = bad times. They don’t seem to like me anyway, I think they sense the bad waves coming off of me. I really don’t know how to act around children. I lack the mothering instinct. People talk to me about stupid things their child has done and I just kinda nod and smile and pretend to be interested when really, I couldn’t give a shit. The worst thing is when you’re in a shop, and a child comes up and hits you or does something to aggravate you (i.e. dance in the middle of a really narrow aisle when you want to get past) and the mother looks at you and laughs as if to say “Oh, look how funny she is” expecting you to laugh back. Instead, I pull a straight face and look to the side as if to say “control your child, it’s really fucking annoying me”. I really dislike children if you haven’t already noticed.

2) Sick/ill people

I can’t deal with it. Especially hospitals, they freak me out. I went to one the other day with my friend because her mum works there, and it was awful. You see people being milled about on these little beds and the smell made me nauseous. I  don’t know how to react when someone tells me they’re sick. And I’m not talking about the stupid kind of sick, where the conversation goes like this:

Me: How are you?

Person: Yeh, good. Apart from my head hurts and Ive got a migraine and my foot hurts and blah blah blah I’m so boring.

NO ONE WANTS TO HEAR YOUR LIFE STORY, STFU! My friend once fainted in class and I freaked out. What the hell was I supposed to do? My mum had a stomach bug not so long ago, and after she was done being sick and everything she had a go at me coz I ran away upstairs. Vomit is the worst smell in the world and the sound of someone ralphing is gross.

3) Old people

Firstly, LOL at that picture. Secondly. a bit like children, I’m generally awkward around them. Especially when they talk to you when you’re at the bus stop, minding your own business, and talk about how late buses are and the weather. Surely they had more interesting things to talk about when they were younger? Why don’t they talk about those things now?

You’re probably thinking now I’m not very people-friendly. Well, in all honesty, I’m not. So I’ve been told, when you first meet me, you don’t like me. Which is kinda mean, but whatever. I take that same approach to people. When I first meet people, I first say hi disliking them already and I guess it’s their job to make me like them. Sounds weird and fucked up, but hey, I can’t help it. I’m socially awkward

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