500 Miles

1.   Flats

2.   Steps

3.   Short Cuts

In the last 62 hours I have had 8 hours’ total sleep. I  have travelled more than 1000 miles.   I have had a puncture at 80mph in the outside lane of a motorway.  i have had my roots done.  I told you there is Always A Good Thing.  No idea where to begin.  A long trip for the Office, which I did by car because it’s the fastest way to get about the UK.  If you count your time in the numbers of breakfasts and bedtimes missed with small people you cannot go by train or fly.  It just takes too bloody long.  My colleague drove us back to The City.  A very long way from home indeed, there was a loud, horrible clacking noise.  Captain Sullenberger steered us across two lanes of traffic to come to a smoking, stinking halt on the hard shoulder.  Trucks the size of car ferries whizzed by feet from us.  We scrambled up the freezing embankment and took refuge on the side of a gantry for the junction far away.  I was in a black linen frock and 3 inch heels.  I went back to the car to put out the red triangle. And to burrow in the boot for a pair of sensible shoes. 

Wheels sorted and more than two hours added to the trip, we motored back through roadworks, traffic queues, rain, wind and spray.  We realised I wasn’t going to make it back home, and I checked into a hotel at 1am this morning. Crashed out, got up again at 5 and headed back. It was 0645 when I drew up outside The House. The lights were on downstairs.  The Man was in the kitchen, dressed. He put the kettle on.  Son 1 aged 5y 4m and Son 2 aged 2y 4m were upstairs watching telly.  “Mummee!  Mummeee! I’s coming!”   Little Son 2, sweet and smiling.  Son 1 not far behind, hanging back, curled up on the stair in his playing-hard-to-get pose. He suddenly sprang up.  “Can I look in your bag?”  There is always the chance of a present.

I had today off, but still needed to go into The Office. And then a visit to Lifestyle Guru Hairdresser.  LGH knows everything. The going rate for the Tooth Fairy (Son 1 thinks he has a wobbly tooth.) Whether I should be compulsively blagging party places for Son 2 for every invitation Son 1 has (she says she blags places for children she has staying with her as well.  How to beat the School Run traffic with a secret shortcut.   i collected Son 1. At home both boys were exhausted.  I dished out presents. ELC fish for Son 2. “I go bed now. I wan’ my barf.”  Ben 10 Lego for Son 1. They were in bed and asleep at 1930.   I will go up as soon as I can heave myself off this sofa.

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